Allow me to add a few words before taking you to Roo Z’s post on the subject. There are so many non-sense practices and obsessions have become as a part of Pakistani Culture.
We debate those with ourselves and within the close circle but we never addressed them openly because of fear of disrespecting a tradition or culture.
This is NOT culture.
This is a form of worst harassment. This is an unhealthy, unethical, disturbing, unnecessary, ugly, hateful, and poisonous mindset that has destroyed more families than anything else in our society.
On Socials Say, we openly talked about those negative-normals of our society, for the sake of awareness.
Today i feel the need to touch a sensitive topic which has the tendency to upset women a lot more than people realize.
Is it ever 𝘰𝘬 to ask a woman if she’s pregnant?
Pakistani households are obsessed with procreation, so much so that when a girl who’s raised in an environment that has brainwashed her over the years gets married, getting pregnant is her first priority post-wedding festivities.
I’ve seen countless victims of such households. the obsession doesn’t stop here though, you’ll be frequently inquired about “𝘬𝘩𝘶𝘴𝘩 𝘬𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘳𝘪” which the irrelevant aunties think they’re entitled to know from the very next day of your wedding till the day they finally get the news of you popping out a baby or the day they finally lose all the hope.
Their kind doesn’t rest. They’re insensitive and shallow. They’ll gossip about you with a complete disregard to your mental & physical condition/state & your decision to have or not to have a baby. You’re incredibly lucky if you don’t have such kind in your life.
Pregnancy is complicated. You’d think those aunties knew better, and they do, but they’re painfully ignorant. Not everyone’s ecstatic about their pregnancy. In worse cases; what if they’re trying and not succeeding?
The couple may be struggling with infertility, they may have lost their previous pregnancy or child, or the woman just has a round up-front belly for all you know!
Spare her the heartache and allow others’ lives to be more complex than the quick stories we end up making up about them.
You don’t want to inquire about pregnancy from a newly-married woman nor from someone who’s been married for over a decade even. Whatever she chooses to do with her life is no one’s business.
It’s the 21st century and despite all the efforts that have been made to cease body-shaming globally, and especially when everyone should be increasingly empathetic about pregnancy issues – people still make such inquires and they do so frequently.
Some even have the heart to humiliate themselves by proceeding the discussion.
So no, it is never OK to ask a woman if she’s pregnant unless you have a health, safety or legal reason to ask.
It is rude, selfish, and utterly thoughtless!